I didn’t march on Washington this weekend. I didn’t march in my hometown. I did my own march. Marched to the bank, to visit a friend, to the car wash and grocery store and then marched home to be with my husband.
I didn’t shout at anyone, set anyone’s hair on fire, or scream The P Word at the top of my lungs.
I don’t have to do those things. Because I haven’t bought into the irrational fear sold by the main stream media that Donald Trump is out to grab my vagina and send me back to the stone age.
I find it rather silly to believe in this day and age that 100 years of progress toward women’s equality can be undone by one man, or one presidential administration. Yet, millions of women feel that way apparently. It’s a bit frightening to know that so many have so little faith in their fellow citizens. As if the rest of the country is just going to lay down and let anyone take away a woman’s right to vote, or to equal pay. Really? I have chronic anxiety, so I live in a world of irrational fear and yet this fear that Donald Trump is going to send us back to pre-20th century social policy doesn’t seem realistic.
The only things Trump is going to change for women in 2017-2020 is putting more of them to work. As I type this he pulled the U.S. out of the Trans Pacific Partnership. Girls, that’s a win. That’s a good thing. More U.S. jobs means more opportunities for women. It means economic recovery to communities who need it.
One of the speakers at the Women’s March in Washington is Donna Hylton. Donna Hylton is a feminist and advocate for incarcerated women. Isn’t that great? Do you know how she got to be such an advocate? She was incarcerated. She served a 25 year sentence for the brutal torture and murder of a 62 year old New York real estate broker. Along with three friends, she lured the man to an apartment they had tricked out for torture and murder. There they beat, starved, raped and tortured the man for 15 – 20 days before he died. Then they shoved his broken body into a foot locker and left him to rot. An Associated Press archived article on the kidnap/murder of Thomas Vigliarole in 1985.
She was profiled in 1995, 10 years into her sentence by Psychology Today in an article about incarcerated women. Now, released from prison, Donna Hylton is a feminist darling who credits childhood abuse for the violent torture murder for which she was convicted. A murder she participated in for the promise of payment of $9,000. Money she hoped to use to build a modeling portfolio.
Now, if you want to spend the weekend standing in the rain wearing your little vagina cap screaming about how no one can touch your pussy, then by all means do. I’m not anti-feminist and I’m all for marching. March all you want, it’s your right. Just know who’s leading the band.
I did a really nice and really dumb thing yesterday. My goal for 2017 is to be kind and more Christ-like. So when a client, who I know to be practically homeless and car-less, came to the office with a sad story about needing a ride to replace a car battery, I loaned him my car.
Now, this guy isn’t a stranger. He’s a client and for the past few months while we handle his PI case, I’ve been helping him in his time of crisis. I gave him food, small amount of money and I even gave him our son’s old junker car when he said he could fix it up and get it running.
My car is your basic mom-sedan. A Chevy: 4 doors, sunroof, OnStar. No real thrills. And I have plenty of insurance, so I wasn’t worried about accidents. It’s just parked there uselessly between nine and five, after all. And he only needed it to make a short run to Walmart to exchange a car battery so his own car could get up and running.
I figured to help him out and so gave him my car key. Wisely, I kept my house and work keys on my key ring.
An hour passes. Then another. Then it’s 5:30 p.m. and my car is nowhere in sight.
I began to panic. Not so much about the car, but what I would tell my husband. He was about to be righteously pissed off. Reluctantly, I called my husband and told him what I’d done. I loaned my car to someone and they took off with it. He was predictably furious, but kept his cool saying only one, “I told you so.” I made a police report to two very kind officers and they helped me notify OnStar. OnStar, God bless them, located the car in minutes and in less than an hour, the highway patrol had it pulled over.
I wish I could say the car was recovered with no harm done after a hilarious series of misunderstandings, but it wasn’t. That little fucker stole my car and was halfway to Oklahoma before the Missouri State Highway Patrol and OnStar located it and disabled the ignition. Oh, and he was driving drunk. I’m lucky he didn’t mow down a row of nuns on his way out of town with my car and the last of my good will.
“How stupid!” you say. “Who loans their car to a practical stranger?!” Well, he wasn’t a practical stranger. I talked to him nearly every day and was doing my level best to get him a settlement for a motor vehicle accident. I felt as if I knew this person. Clearly, I did not.
I’ve always been a soft touch. I believe in people and I believe in doing good deeds and giving to people less fortunate. Now, that good will has been thrown in my face and rewarded with an extraordinary tow and storage bill.
I don’t think I have words for how stupid I feel. I trusted someone and took them at their word and got burned badly. I don’t want to be the kind of person who hardens their heart and never helps anyone ever again. I don’t want to be jaded and cold toward people in need. And I probably won’t be, it’s just difficult to process this kick in the teeth.
So now, the thief is in jail. My car is parked in a tow lot 100 miles away. I am thankful it wasn’t damaged, but I really don’t care about the car. It’s just a car. It’s a thing and easily replaced. What is really damaged is my faith in people. And my faith in myself. I trusted God to take care of me and now this happens? Why did this happen to me when I was just trying to help someone out? The urge to slam the door of my heart to the world last night was very, very strong.
Despite this crisis, my faith remains strong. I will remain faithful to God and not curse the car thief or rage at my own stupidity. My intentions were pure, although my discernment was lacking. My faith tells me this is God’s way of removing this toxic person from my life. God is in control and like I said; I’m only out a car for a few days. I’m inconvenienced. Darren the car thief is going to be in jail for a while, but at least he’ll have 3 hots and a cot which is more than he was getting on his own.
So there’s my story for the first week of 2017. My first good deed of the year is immediately punished. It can only get better from here.